the pigeons will not win! | redefining a designer

this morning i had the pleasure of catching up on emily's blog over at Timeless Paper, a wonderfully amazing blog that features her work, her home, and her favorite things with a super modern, creative, and classic flare. i had some time to rummage through her old archived posts that i hadn't read and had to laugh out loud when i found this little ditty of a chart. (image at left..click the link to appreciate it in it's fullest!) a little backstory to put it in perspective...

i had called off sick the day before, but shuffled into the office on a grey february thursday morning in 2009. i knew it was d-day. the writing was on the wall (and a helpful tip from a friend the day before clued me in to what was coming). i had spent the last 7 years of my life studying, working, drawing, slaving over design and every detail and aspect that was my life as a designer. i had allowed myself and my work to be critiqued and torn apart in every which way, fighting for my own voice. i was, and had been, mentally and physically done with it for at least six months prior. i had other plans to tend to, and another future i was looking forward to taking on with full force. but i was still angry and scared and sad. there i sat, knowing many others would be in the same spot that day, being handed a very "legally composed" form letter about how my dedication to the company was appreciated and my position was being terminated. whatever. it is what it is.

my break from the corporate world was ultimately met with excitement on my end, while my husband put on his best supportive grin, grabbed a bottle of bourbon, and made plans to live in a shack down by the river. ok, so not really, but what the heck were we gonna do? i ended up following two paths, which has still left me straddling two worlds {the clinical and the creative}. my desire to find a profession in which i could contribute to something greater than myself drove me to a long pondered role as a nurse--an interest i'd held a long time, but never thought i had the stomach. but the designer in me has always lingered--experimenting, working, trying to follow that true passion that burns in my gut.

there was a point where i felt like i lost my creativeness--like i left it on a park bench somewhere with a PBJ to be devoured by pigeons. my recent redevotion to who i am, what i think defines ME, has left me drunk with my love for design and art again. i can't stop reading, thinking, or dreaming about it and it makes me happy again...gives me hope that one day i will get to where i want to be. in the meantime, thanks for sharing this emily--made me remember where i've been and where i want to go :)